My son asked me last night how the Be A Positive Light website was going. I didn’t want to go into great details of it so I just said I haven’t been feeling it lately so I haven’t been on there. He got a little upset with me. Brandon tells me, “Mom, it’s your job. You have to do it even when you don’t feel like it. People depend on you. You are important and make a difference.” My heart felt so sad and proud at the same time. I haven’t been on here because I have felt great sadness. My personal relationship hasn’t been going the way I want and my children are spending the summer with their dad. This is the first time I have spent 3 months without seeing any of my children. I also started feeling that my website wasn’t important. But in one moment, my 11 year old son made me realize how wrong I was. First off, I was focusing on my sadness which is giving power to that sadness, creating more sadness. After talking with Brandon, I immediately started making a list of 10 things I am grateful for in both of these situations that make me sad. I started feeling better around grateful thing #3. I really do have so much to be grateful for. Instead of focusing on my sadness and giving it power, I choose to focus on the blessings. What you focus on, you receive more of. I want to receive more blessings!
Second, my website DOES matter. I know there are millions of positive websites out there, some with millions of followers. I only have a few. BUT, my son is one of those few. HE believes in me. My website and my positive light thinking have started changing the way he thinks and sees the world. All I want to do is to help people. I want people to feel love and happiness. If I only help one person, I have served God’s purpose. My website is my job, my duty, my purpose. Even on days that I don’t “feel it”, it is still my job. There is a saying, fake it till you make it. That is true. Even if I don’t wake up feeling all bubbly, I should still write on my blog. Writing to my followers might help them but in return would help me. Distancing myself doesn’t do anything but hurt me.
A child like thinking broke me out of my slump. I apologize to my followers and to my son for my self-pity. I am so thankful my son doesn’t see limited thinking. I am so grateful God gave me 3 beautiful, intelligent children. I am happy Brandon reminded me that I have a purpose. Today, I will start my day by telling God thank you for waking me today, for it was not promised to me. Then I will follow it with a list of 10 things I have to be thankful for. I will spend my day focusing on my fabulous life. I will spend time meditating on my great life. I will give away smiles to everyone I see. Life is a precious thing. Thank you God for this life and all that it offers me. I choose a happy, abundant life. I WILL BE A POSITIVE LIGHT!